A typcial week...

So here is just a quick list of "Only in Zambia" moments I've had this week.

1. During our lesson on days of the week, a grade 1 students says: "I go to church on sunday so I wont be thrown on hell fire". I can't stop laughing.

2. On the minibus I was using to leave my village the driver randomly stopped the vehicle, got on a bicycle and rode away.

3. A crazy man kicked me while I was walking and a group of men who witnessed it chased him down, they came back to tell me "See Zambia is a very peaceful country,when someone attacks you we beat them". Harmony.

4. During a cab ride which held 5 passengers in the back seat ( me being one of them), we came across a river in the middle of the road due to heavy rains. The driver drives through it, water rises to just below the windows, the curious woman next to me opens the door. For 45 minutes I sit stranded in a vehicle in water almost up to my knees that is so dark I cant see my feet.

5.My head teacher's wife gets caught in the act, getting it on hot and heavy in the bushes. The next day it's on the radio that the wife to my school head is a home wrecker. The same day my head teacher announces his transfer to a new school. (I guess this could happen in America, but whatev.)

6. In a hitch with a random driver, a half hour into the ride the driver turns to us in the backseat and says, will you get the tequila out of that cooler and make me a drink. And we do.

7. A man walks by with his phone tied to a stick about 3 feet in the air, with a head set in, having a conversation, and clearly determined to get network.

8. The same drunk man who told me how peacefull a country Zambia is tells me when people ask me what I think of the government I should ball my hand into a fist (the sign of the opposition party). He says "If you hold your hand like this, in the shape of an L (supporting the current ruling party) then you will be attacked" my response " Sure, well what if I do nothing?" To which the peace maker of a man says "Ah, you will die".

9. During a ride I accepted from some guy he asks me, " You want Coke or Fanta?". I'm not thirsty so I say neither. His response, "This isn't Europe, this is Africa." "But sir I've never even been to Europe", "Well I don't know how you do things in the U.K. but today you're drinking Fanta".

10.A crazy man who tells me God revealed to him in spirit that I am his niece tells me my mother is at a funeral today and then looks at me very seriously and says "Now buy uncle a mango,and tell all of my wives I'm still here and I'm hungry".

Yep, life here may be simple but clearly it's never boring.

up, up, and away,
J.Obayan